this gifset makes me really angry. hell, it makes me feel sick to my stomach when i pause long enough to analyze it.
the truth is, dean never had to bury sam. even with the multiple times they’ve died, dean never had to bury sam. he never got to feel the gut-wrenching, soul-consuming pain of burying his brother.
guess what, kids.
sam had to carry his brother’s corpse back into the impala. sam had to scrape off as much blood as he possibly could from dean’s body. sam had to dress his brother. all while staring down at the dead body beneath him. can you pause to imagine the amount of pain he felt? can you imagine what his mental state was like? can you possibly imagine what it feels like to dig a hole in the ground for the person you love most in the world?
sam does. he had nothing left after that. no mom, no dad, no jess, and finally— there was no dean.
how do you recover from that? how could anyone blame sam for the steps that he took next? how could anyone blame sam for being so revenge ridden? how could anyone blame sam for wanting lillith’s head on a platter?
i … just don’t know, man.
and you wanna know what the bitch of the bunch is, sam had to do it twice. once in mystery spot, and again in no rest for the wicked. twice.